When Normal Life Becomes A Burden

“But if that slave says to himself, ‘My master is delayed in coming,’ and if he begins to beat the other slaves, men and women, and to eat and drink and get drunk,” – Luke 12:45, NRSV

No, this is not a whole thought, but I like the idea.

Sometimes, normal life can become burdensome. The act of doing a load of laundry can become equivalent to running a 5k. In these times, I have walked to the washer, stood in front of it staring it down, and turned around in defeat. It was just too much.

On my way back to the rock that I was planning to crawl back under, I passed the dishes that peaked out over the sink. They can be more dangerous than they look. Better leave it for a stronger moment.

Then, there is the weight of relationships. Perhaps, our friends would understand if we don’t want to call them right now, or next week. Being on the phone might waste time and energy. Apparently, I need all the energy that I can salvage if I am going to continue in a battle of will with household appliances. Don’t get me started about the grocery store, the bills, the taxes. These are further evidence of dangerous domestic forces.

And, the poor husband, I could just post a wedding picture and let him think of better days until I get my feet back under me.

This is what the slave in Luke 12:45 teaches me…when our eyes cannot find something more, something bigger, something God, we flounder. In this verse, it is eternal perspective. When we forget that we were built for eternity, minutia can take over our lives. The five minute chore becomes the two hour chore. Our prayers become unintelligible sputters and distracted niceties.

I know, I have been here.

I find it interesting that this slave gives two behavioral options when he loses sight of Christ’s return. He recklessly inflicts harm on others and he inflicts careless negligence on himself. This slave knows of the master. He is directed by a prudent manager and has been given everything he needs to do his work.

Still, this is his struggle. This is my struggle. I take my eye off of Christ and my world starts to swell up. Like inflatable pool toys, the washer becomes a stronghold. Who knows what could happen if I open that lid? Should I be trusted to pour the right amount of detergent onto those clothes?

The growing intensity of the unaccomplished can take over our lives.

I believe careless negligence starts from losing eternal perspective. We have work to do, and it does not belong to us. It is the work of the Father. It is valuable. It does not look like other people’s occupations. He might ask you to do less, but increase the intensity of your tasks. He might ask you to do more, forcing you to rely on those new mercies every morning to accomplish half of what your day needs to produce.

At the point which we neglect ourselves, like dominoes the things around us fall. One day we are kissing exercise good-bye, and the next we are piling newspapers next to the door hoping to take them to the recycling bin…someday. We are becoming reckless and soon we don’t feel like making coffee dates or laughing at our husbands’ jokes. Harm sets in and things start to fall off.

There are only two solutions that I have found. First, I have to come to God in prayer willing to be refreshed. I have to lay myself out in repentance. He delights in teaching me a new perspective, and gently restores eternity in my heart and in my head.

The second tool that I use for motivation is to talk to the woman I want to be. I stand in front of the washer and say, “What would she do?” She would fold the sheets when they came out of the dryer so I wouldn’t be looking at them next week. She would make that appointment now, so we don’t have to have the same conversation, again.

She would be more proactive, and rebuke this negligence with scripture. She would sit at the Father’s feet until He told her to get up. This internal guide works because the Spirit desires to grow us, sees our potential and delights in teaching us.

The choice becomes: I can slowly fall apart or I can be about the Father’s work.

I think that I will go do some laundry.

Some Fudge, Some Fruit, and Some Agreement

Things that I know from this New Year 2010 thing:

Any song by Frankie Valli and the Four Seasons makes it a party.

There are still no good shows on TV this week.

I am going to have to work hard to switch over to the Mac that my husband bought me for Christmas, but it is SO COOL!

I need to look at the food pyramid again because I am pretty sure that fudge is not a food group represented therein.

I have not seen, “I want to be more intentional about repentance”, on anyone’s New Year’s resolutions.

Not that I blame anyone, of course. It is not on mine, but let me tell you what I do see. The Christian women who are making goals and resolutions are largely acclaiming the furtherance of the Spirit’s work in their lives. Losing weight, that is self-control. Increasing the intensity of devotional times is faithfulness.

(Here is a thought, what if we set one goal for each fruit of the Spirit? I just thought of that. Interesting method?)

I have found that when we intentionally seek fruit (love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, generosity, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control) and allow it to be sown, ripened and picked through our lives, we feel more content and intentional about our lives.

So, this arbitrary mark, once a year, makes us stop and feel uncomfortable about the areas where fruity growth is lacking. I have no idea where this discomfort is the rest of the year. I must save it up.

The other source of discomfort is comparison. It is easy to compare ourselves to others and want what they have. This is not fruitful growth, though. It stems from fear, whether it is not feeling adequate or having a poor body image, etc. Donna Otto says, “Faithfulness and fear do not coexist”. That has proven true in my life.

Going back to the topic of repentance…Matthew 1:21 (NRSV), tells us, “She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.”

That is why Jesus came, to save us from our sin. He saved us from eternity apart from Him, and He saved us from lives without hope and purpose. We are driven to bear His fruit because He saved us from the alternative.

The Savior has claimed the object of His salvation.

This is where repentance becomes real. Repentance means changing one’s mind. It is a movement away from what is now understood as wrong, to right. The movement is the really the important part of it. My favorite understanding of repentance is from a wonderful friend who says, “Repentance is when you finally tell God that you agree with Him”. The object of His salvation moves into agreement with the Savior.

I read this verse last week and it has been playing out in my head ever since then.

Bear fruit worthy of repentance. (Matthew 3:8, NRSV)

Or, if you prefer…

Produce fruit in keeping with repentance. (Matthew 3:8, NIV)

The fruit that we bear needs to be worthy of repentance. Our fruit needs to be sown and grown and ripened in the field of repentance. This is the field watered with blood of Christ. It needs to be esteemed alongside the act of changing our mind and moving from what is wrong to what is right for us, and our homes.

Sounds a bit like making resolutions, doesn’t it? The thing that I have not done, while making my resolutions, is repent in the areas that I lacked last year. This verse tells me that it does not start with making more plans to bear fruit in 2010. It starts by pulling my heart in line with His. It starts by agreeing that, in some areas, I was not what I could have been last year. To be honest, there were moments that I simply wasted His time. The reason that I did not accomplish some of these things is my lackadaisical will. I was just lazy. I wasn’t alert. I agree with Him. That was my fault.

Repentance brings our minds in line with the Spirit of Christ, our comforter while He is away. Is it no wonder that fruit can only come from such a humbling act?

Thank you for sharing all of your resolutions for 2010. It has been wonderful to read them and see the places that God wants to grow fruit in your lives. I have read most of them, but I would love to see more. If you are doing resolutions, leave me a comment. I would love to visit.